Friday, May 21, 2010

Another Pool Rant

This has happened before...and unfortunately it will probably happen again...

Is there something in chlorine that messes with swimmer's brains? Particularly in the consideration-for-others cortex? Or perhaps those pool-fumes cause temporary blockage between the nice nodes and the logical lobe?

Don't hate me, hear me out - I'm not just unnecessarily ripping on swimmers here (I have nothing against swimmers as people, Sister1 and Newbie are both swimmers and I like them just fine) no, this ripping is fully deserved. 

Case to be studied: Me, pooling, Wednesday night at they YMCA. 

I hate math (as I'm sure you do too) but humor me with this very simple word problem. 

You arrive at the pool presented with this situation:
There are 2 lanes. 

There are 2 swimmers in one of the lanes.

There are 2 swimmers and 1 pool-runner in the other lane. 

You are the 
6th person.

Two lanes.

Which one do you get in????

If you're an intelligent functioning human being (as I like to think all my readers are), you would get in the lane with only 2 people, right? 
Not the one that already has 3 people? Yep. Me too. Because that just makes sense. 

But that's not how things worked out. I was the 
pool-runner (if you didn't already get that), and when Mr. Pale-Saggy-Moobs-Who-Swims-Down-The-Middle-Of-The-Lane showed up, he decided to get in the lane that already had 3 people in it. True story. W. T. F?

(And to add to this already-annoying situation, the 2 swimmers in the lane with me were doing the butterfly - aka the splashiest stroke ever. Ugh.)

After about 30 minutes, the swimmers left me and Mr. Pale-Saggy-Moobs-Who-Swims-Down-The-Middle-Of-The-Lane to ourselves. And this guy
continued to swim in the middle of the lane. As in, he ran into me multiple times! Like WHAT? Are you freaking kidding me? 

This is how it's supposed to work: Two people in one lane. Each stays on one side. I am not making that up. Those are the rules of common courtesy. 

Maybe this is a territorial, he thinks I don't belong in the pool because I'm 
running and not swimming (which trust me, I totally agree! I would do anything to get out of the water and run the roads!), so he tries to muscle me out of the pool? This is pure speculation, but if that is the case, how rude

I would never I think of doing that to anyone. Any and all swimmers are completely welcome on my track. And I would be courteous and run around them. Not into them. I'm just saying...

And then the man had the nerve to try to make small-talk with me when he finished his "workout." Um, excuse me sir, but I just spent the last 40 minutes restraining myself from punching you in the face. We are not friends. 

And that is all I have to say about that.


  1. Sorry...I love math. I can't help it. Chalk it up to raging hormones.

    Maybe it was more territorial than you know; can you be sure he didn't pee on you too?

    (sorry..couldn't help it)

  2. As a fellow pool-runner, who goes 2X a week for the last 3 years, I will say when I initially started, some of the swimmers (especially the older ones!) purposefully splashed me. For what reason, I have no idea. I take up less space than a fellow swimmer and whatever I'm doing in the pool, cannot possibly inconvenience them. BUT I think over time people have now gotten so used to me, and realize that a workout is a workout and I'm not leaving just because you splashed me.

    But, I'm lucky in that unless there is Tri-Training or masters classes, we never have more than 2 to a lane. Sorry you are having such a tough time with the pool, hopefully swimmers will begin to realize that you are just as fit as they are and pool running is just as difficult as swimming!

    Keep at it, show you don't care, that seems to show them you're in it for the long haul(and wear a hat!) ;) Maybe try the morning hours?

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  4. Clearly, anonymous is way too bad-ass to post his/her name! Love it.

    As a swimmer (former pool runner) I feel your pain every time I swim during open swim...mainly with old people, aquarobicists who use 5 lanes for 3 women to prance around chatting...pool rage is a very real thing. For some reason out here they never break it into slow/medium/fast so it's a total cluster. Also love when people jump in without warning and swim directly toward me.

    I once had an old man tell me he can't be responsible for his "6 foot wingspan" and proceeded to swim inverted breakstroke down the middle of the lane. Oh and there was the old woman who couldn't share a lane because she wasn't wearing goggles and "couldn't see good" yea...I hear ya.

    Just be thankful you'll be healed and you'll be out...

  5. Haha, thanks Amy! I miss pooling with you!!!

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  7. Boo i'm sad i missed anonymous' comments must have been interested to be removed ;)

    Amy I heart you and yes, pool rage is very real. Sometimes I think I'm ridiculous with my pool rage thoughts, so it is good to hear I'm not alone. I feel the YMCA is the most annoying pool situation many times because old people are ornery, but once you befriend them, they tend to lighten up, but there is def some territorial staking going on with them. They feel that they are old and have been on the earth not to mention at that pool for a very long time, so to switch it up and make them change routine annoys them. I contemplate evil anger jump attacks on some of these said people while pool running - it helps pass the time. I do miss running with people because it seems to help the situation if you have two people pooling together. But, i do love when people come over and ask what I'm doing and I get to explain to them and they look on with awe as you "tread" water for an hour. hahaha.

    I also will wear a cap when I pool run it helps feel like you're not getting splashed as badly and if you turn your body sideways to the splasher as they go by it helps too and is like secretly snubbing them as well, hahaha. just a mental relief.

    As my friend comforted me one day while pool ranting, she said, "no one likes to get splashed it's like being spit on." nuff said. I may have told you that before but I just keep repeating it to myself because it's so true!

    Love ya Mol!

  8. This made me laugh, a lot, and after this evening know exactly what you're talking about. Thanks for sharing!